I can’t believe it. Calling on my best efforts and intentional
watching, I am still struggling
with the clock. I seem to be living by
it and I hate it. I awaken to constitutional duties, reading, devotional,
meditating, glance at the clock and dread that I must be off to time-sensitive
deadlines that have been driving my days for the last three or four months. I
have so much designed and desired to accomplish that I embarrass myself when I
realize I’m far, far behind my goals. Is
it my age? Is it I’m physically and/or
mentally challenged? I’ve noticed
myself more irritated than ever when an unexpected call comes in on my iphone. I
feel some guilt when Bettyann calls to remind me of appointments or ask when I
will be home for dinner. I wish I was
not bound to my clock set fifteen minutes ahead in my car, at my shop and the
Seth Thomas, melodiously chiming out the hour and the half. It’s just another sign that my every moment
is synchronized and controlled.
In contrast to the "objective" measures
of time marking seconds, minutes, and hours, there is this "subjective"
experience of time being "fast or slow." Of late I’ve described my experience
of time as passing with lightning speed.
One of my friends, laughingly said that I am finally catching up with
the rest of my generation. Have I been that far behind? I do recognize that weekends, especially Sundays,
as ephemeral, while my work week plods slowly by with little accomplished (my good friend asks "compared to what?"—and yet both are marked by the
same objective measurements of time. How
is it that my subjective experience of time is so different from what that
fifteen minute lead setting on my shop clock objectively marks out for me,
second by second, hour by hour?
Studying on it for the past few mornings; I’m
finding the question of my subjective experience of time is one that the ancient
philosophers and early Christian leaders pondered. Their philosophical and theological musings have
left many perplexities regarding the
human experience of time. I read the
other morning where Saint Augustine wrestled with the fleeting character of human
temporal experience. He suggests that no
sooner do I apprehend the present than it has receded into the past. He wrote, "We cannot rightly say what
time is, except by reason of its impending state of not-being."
I confess of having real issues with the way I perceive
and think about the nature of time, but I guess what I’m beginning to
understand is how crucial for my life is the significance of events that are happening
moment by moment, hour by hour, and day by day. In pursuit I browsed: Exploring
Reality: The Intertwining of Science & Religion
by John
Polkinghorne who wrote how theologians of all stripes have tried
to understand the nature of time by what takes place in time—a narrative of
unfolding events. These theological discussions seem to involve God's
engagement with time. Is God a wholly
atemporal being, outside of time and history?
Or is God genuinely engaged with time and revealed through an unfolding
story of historical disclosure?
It all get a little too “heady” for me but one
thing that I do understand from experience is that the biblical writers give
witness to a God who progressively unfolds saving acts within history. The divine plan of salvation that Christians
believe culminates in the life and ministry of Jesus Christ is called salvation
history. God did not, for example,
reveal every aspect of salvation to Abraham or to Moses. Instead, the biblical writers give witness to
the God who works within and through the temporal events of history to reveal
the plan of redemption. Anyone can see
this unfolding in God's commissioning of Moses prior to the Exodus 6: 2-3 "I appeared to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob
as God Almighty (El Shaddai) but by my name 'the Lord (Yahweh)' I did not make
myself known." Within the long ministry of the prophets, a God is revealed
who gradually discloses what will take place.
Isaiah presents the God who "proclaims to you new things from this
time; even hidden things which you have not known. They are created now, and not long ago: and
before today you have not heard them." Isaiah 48:6-7
For every Christians, God's decisive revelatory
action in time is in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ which we
just celebrated. While there are many
glimpses, sign-markers, and hints pointing towards a messianic redeemer in the
Old Testament, ultimately God chose to enter a particular time as a human being
to live life among the time-bound.
The significance of those time-bound events
continues into my life time. And into eternity!
I’m more convinced than ever that through the unfolding of time, I can grow
in my understanding of who God is and what God has done through Jesus, the
Messiah. I’m thinking that here in John 6
as Jesus spoke with his disciples, he suggests that there would be more to
learn and more to reveal through the work of the Holy Spirit: "I
have many more things to say to you, but you cannot bear them now. But when the Spirit of truth comes, he will
guide you into all the truth; for he will not speak on his own initiative, but
whatever he hears he will speak; and he will disclose to you what is to come."
I also believe that the witness of Scripture
suggests that the events of my life reveals this ongoing work of the
Spirit. Sometimes, I do apprehend the
significance of those events in the present time, but other times it seems only
through the lens of my minds rear view mirror that I understand God's
action. While time moves quickly at
times and slowly at others, while minutes and seconds and hours are filled with
appointments, creating wood objects, napping, graduations, traveling,
gardening, journaling, worship, fellowship and all the events that make up my
time-bound existence, I would do well to look around to see how the Spirit of
God is working through the ordinary events in the march of time.
Father, God, as Your child and follower of Jesus I
trust that I will never forget that Your Son entered time to enact the new
creation of His resurrection. As I grow
in my understanding of that timeless act, the events of my temporal life acts
as sign-markers for eternity. And while I
will continue to see the significance of my time-bound events "through a
mirror darkly," the day will come when "all things are subjected to
Him...that God may be all in all."
Amen
